Monday, December 21, 2009, 3:44 AM
Nothing lasts forever.
So as life goes on, there would eventually be goodbyes.
Would we face it with courage and leave everything behind gracefully?
Or would we hang on to the memories and suffer in the pain?
Its not easy to put down everything gracefully because you can't simply hit the "erase" button. It doesn't exist. So we have to face the cruel reality.
The pain would be excruciating.
It's impossible to leave. I've let myself sink too deep.
I'm so stupid. I couldn't see clearly how much it meant to you.
I can't leave now. I've left myself go too far.
But I must. I don't belong with you anymore.
I'm not yours anymore. You're not mine either.
You have your choices, and I have mine.
My choice is you but your choice might not be me.
I'm scared you know.
I don't know when you'll eventually tell me to go because I annoy you so fucking much.
I abhor my actions.
I detest myself sometimes.
Why can't I be like other people?
They make it seem so easy to leave.
I can only cling on, struggle painfully.
So now, I'm gonna let go of you.
You deserve something better.
I'll be alright, I'm dead serious.
But, being such a jerk, I'm gonna let myself do this one last time.
Christmas, our .. supposedly 1 year anniversary, if we had stayed together.
My last chance, hope.
Whatever it is, its the last time I'll ever bother you.
I can let you go after that.
I won't hold on to you anymore.
I'll move on. Really.